Messages on signs seen round the world 5

In a Bangkok temple:
 "it is forbidden to enter a woman, even a foreigner, if dressed as a man."

Hotel, Acapulco:
 "the manager has personally passed all the water served here."

Dry cleaners, Bangkok:
 "drop your trousers here for the best results.

Messages on signs seen round the world 4

A laundry in Rome: LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME.
*
Tourist agency, Czechoslovakia: TAKE ONE OF OUR HORSE-DRIVEN CITY TOURS. WE GUARANTEE NO MISCARRIAGES.

*
Advertisement for donkey rides, Thailand: WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?
*
The box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong: GUARANTEED TO WORK THROUGHOUT ITS USEFUL LIFE.

Messages on signs seen round the world 3

Hotel, Japan: 
YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID.
*
In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery: 
YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS, AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY.

*
Hotel, Zurich: 
BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS PURPOSE.
*
Advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist: 
TEETH EXTRACTED BY THE LATEST METHODISTS.

Messages on signs seen round the world: 2

On the grounds of a Nairobi private school: NO TRESPASSING WITHOUT PERMISSION.
*
In Amchi Mumbai restaurant: OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK, AND WEEKENDS TOO.
*
In a Japanese cemetery!: PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES.

*
In a Tokyo bar: SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS.
*
Airline ticket office, Copenhagen: WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS.

Messages on signs seen round the world:

Cocktail lounge, Norway: 
LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR.
*
At a Budapest ZOO: 
PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS. IF YOU HAVE ANY SUITABLE FOOD, GIVE IT TO THE GUARD ON DUTY.
*

Doctor's office, Rome: 
SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.
*
In a Nairobi restaurant: 
CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER.

Ridiculous travel insurance claims 2

We present the most ridiculous travel insurance claims made by holidaymakers.

- A pensioner, whose false teeth fell out while he vomited over the side of a cruise ship, put in a claim to his travel insurers for new dentures under “lost baggage”.

- Two holidaymakers in Devon filed a claim for damage to the paintwork of their car after it was licked by a herd of cows.


- Two children in Cornwall buried their parents’ video camera in the sand to prevent it from being stolen whilst they went swimming, but could not remember where. Thankfully, the insurers paid out.

- “A deer headbutted the windscreen of my car, after being enticed by the yellow tax disc," another insurance claims form read.

Ridiculous travel insurance claims

Concerns about the sand being too white, anger at too many fish being in the sea...

One envious holidaymaker complained that his friend’s three-bedroom apartment was “clearly bigger” than his one-bedroom place... 

while others could not hide their frustration that it took them nine hours to fly back to England from Jamaica when it only took the American travellers a mere three hours to get home.

One Briton complained that the £3.50 pair of Ray Ban sunglasses bought from a street vendor, proved to be fake... 
another that his travel agent had failed to tell him to wear swimming trunks for his trip to a water park... 
while another tour operator was criticised for not telling a traveller that mosquitos could, in fact, bite.

Among the more jingoistic grievances were that there were too many Spanish people being in Spain and too much curry served in restaurants in India.